How can we move beyond our emotions and thoughts?
The 4 step process to move beyond our emotions and thoughts that hold us in limbo and keep us stagnant is as follows:
When we are going through the experience, the patterns, feelings thoughts and emotions, feel like reruns of the same show.
We are likely to have felt these feelings of fear, guilt or doubt and incompetency before in previous experiences, which is why they pop up again so strongly.
The thoughts are repetitive, we find ourselves thinking the same things again and again, “ I should be doing this, I should have done that,” or in the case of losing a job, “ What did I do wrong? Why didn’t I this or that? My boss never valued me.”
It is important to recognise these patterns of thinking and feeling, that have a hold over us so we are able to become unhooked.
Label thoughts and emotions accurately:
It's good to label our thoughts to create an objective lens.
When thinking, “ My boss never valued me,” change it to, “ I am having the thought my boss never valued me.”
This helps us to detach and see our thoughts for what they are.
This is the bird’s eye view, stepping aside and not giving our thoughts life.
We are able to see that these thoughts and feelings are moving and do not need to remain permanent.
We are able to collate data of our own thoughts and feelings and work out ways to move through them.
Accept them Rather than fighting our thoughts and emotions It's good to accept them for what they are in the moment.
Research has shown, the more we try to ignore our emotions, the more they are amplified.
Once we are able to accept what we are thinking and feeling, we are offering ourselves some self-compassion leading to insights and observations.
We are able to observe the kind of energy we create in what we think and feel.
Action on your values:
Once we have been successful in recognising our patterns, labelling them to create distance, accepted them and realised the energy they hold, we have begun to unhook ourselves from rumination and unhealthy thoughts and feelings.
It is powerful to now call on our values, which have shaped who we are and have an essence and stability, rather than transiency like our emotions and thoughts.
Our values will guide us into becoming the expression of who we are and what our Spirit calls us to be.
Honouring and Serving,
Simran K. Rattan MD