How do we become vulnerable?
To be vulnerable involves risk. It also involves discernment as to who to be vulnerable with making it a balancing act. Choosing to be vulnerable doesn't mean opening up and getting close to everyone we meet.
It means taking some risk to get to know others if we don't already know them, and giving it time. When we feel safe enough to open up, because we sense a person genuinely cares about us, we are able to gradually share parts of ourselves.
Those who have experienced painful, traumatic or difficult relationships have an almost double edged sword to vulnerability. On one hand they are very good at sensing sincerity in others because of so many bad experiences, fine tuning them to picking up on patterns of behaviours they have witnessed, seen or felt before. On the other hand this is the exact same reason, people keep people at bay, because of the knowing, pain may ensue if they begin getting close to a particular person.
People who have had these bad experiences have a heightened awareness and sensitivity, their bodies already being biologically wired to be in an intense ' fight or flight' mode. More often the guidance by a counsellor, a trusted friend, a specialist, an elder or someone this person considers wise, is needed and sought.
Honouring and Serving,
Simran K. Rattan MD
Content support Maria Peach