Spiritual bypassing leads us to repress feelings and emotions. It is something people do to avoid dealing with pain. This causes stunted growth, keeps us disconnected from being our true authentic self, and is not healthy. The desire to be living in a constant high and elevated state, to causes people to spiritual bypass which may manifests as:
This avoidance and denial of our unaddressed wounds, detracts us from the calling of our true self, and a deeper place of compassion for others and self. Emotions serve as a function to meet our needs. Our brains have specific areas, like the limbic region, which interprets information and produces our emotional reactions. When emotions are not processed and not...
Have you ever felt sometimes it’s easier to portray happiness than how you really feel about something, because you fear being judged and seen as unspiritual? Do you stand guarded at expressing your emotions, for fear of being thought of as negative, not living a spiritual life or failing in your spiritual path? Have you ever bared witness to a friend, family member, colleague, or partner masking their deepest and innermost pains with spiritual ideas and practices? Have you noticed others comparing ‘wholesome’ spiritual journeys with yours, but something doesn't feel right?
What is spiritual bypassing?
There has been an upsurge over the years, in people wanting to experience a spiritual life and learn what it means to connect with that innate power and Divinity within. We desire feelings of peace and love and happiness. So many of us have lived in pain and suffering, to know love is healing. There is a danger in pursuing superficial happiness rather than working...
To be vulnerable with others, also requires work on ourselves, to build strength, self belief, faith in who we are. This provides a base from which we can work off, to then begin to let others into our life, who want us also to experience love.
A beautiful quote by Dr Scott Peck encapsulates the power of reciprocal relationship, intimacy and love.
" Love is the will to extend oneself for the purpose of nurturing one's own or another's spiritual growth."
We develop connection through intimacy and intimacy and connection through vulnerability.
How do we become vulnerable?
To be vulnerable involves risk. It also involves discernment as to who to be vulnerable with making it a balancing act. Choosing to be vulnerable doesn't mean opening up and getting close to everyone we meet.
It means taking some risk to get to know others if we don't already know them, and giving it time. When we feel safe enough to open up, because we sense a person genuinely cares about us, we are able to gradually share parts of ourselves.
Those who have experienced painful, traumatic or difficult relationships have an almost double edged sword to vulnerability. On one hand they are very good at sensing sincerity in others because of so many bad experiences, fine tuning them to picking up on patterns of behaviours they have witnessed, seen or felt before. On the other hand this is the exact same reason, people keep people at bay, because of the knowing, pain may ensue if they begin getting close to a particular person.
People who have...
Our spirit has spiritual needs, and to fulfill them we need to form bonds and relationships with others, to meet these needs. It is through being vulnerable intimacy and trust is built and real unconditional love is experienced.
Through vulnerability we:
• develop trust more
• experience a more deeper love
• experience intimacy and connection
Research has shown that those who have more social ties and feel connected live longer, happier and healthier lives.
There has been documented evidence suggesting:
• Those with good relationships and social connection, have 2x less risk of death.
• People with coronary artery disease who are socially isolated have a 2.4 times increased risk of dying from cardiac disease than those who are socially connected.
Have you had times in your life, where you have been afraid to be vulnerable? Do you crave intimacy, yet because of life experiences are cautious and untrusting of others? Have you been burned one too many times, that the idea of being vulnerable appears impossible?
Vulnerability is something many fear. It's common to be afraid of getting close to people. People are afraid for so many reasons, including worrying others will take advantage of their weaknesses, and continue to dig in wounds. It is understandable after painful experiences, trauma and difficult relationships to avoid being vulnerable, however it isn't healthy to keep people at a distance for a lifetime.
There are times in our lives when we are naturally vulnerable without knowing. Mothers having babies place themselves and their new born in complete trust of those who are supporting with the delivery of their children. People who go to health professionals for advice and open up become...
Uncertainty is frightening, especially when our livelihoods are dependant on it and our families. With guidance and support we need not deal with the present on our own.
We cannot control everything in our lives, however we can find ways to move through these uncertain times. Being around people who understand us is crucial. Together we can pave a way forward.